Food for thought

Since he joined our family, Rubin has been a challenge. Not a bad one, just testing our patience (mine in particular) and posing problems we never thought we'd have to deal with. The main problem has been his inconsistent eating habits.

I've never had a dog who didn't like to eat, but Rubin is the most particular and finicky dog I've ever met. A whole bowl of the most expensive canned food will be set in front of him, he'll sniff it then walk away. From another room I can hear his stomach growl from hunger, still he won't eat. I'll offer a treat and sometimes he'll take it, but if he's particularly hungry, he won't touch it.

He also struggles with what I call intestinal distress. I won't go into details, but after getting up late at night to take a anxious dog outside to do his runny business, I'll take him to the vet whereupon I find out he has neither parasites or giardia just an upset tummy. Prescription? Rice, boiled chicken, cottage cheese, and pumpkin.

He won't eat it.

This last time his intestinal distress lasted over a week, which was unusual. The vet prescribed doggy pepto and antibiotics. In addition, I was supposed to give him "flora" in his food -- a brown powdery substance that came in expensive packets. But how was I supposed to give it to him if he refused to eat?

I took to stuffing globs of food into his mouth until he swallowed. As you can imagine, a battle ensued. I'd fix his food, he'd run to the other room. I'd encourage him to eat and he'd race upstairs fearing I'd force food into his mouth. The weird thing is that once he ate that first shoved in mouthful, he'd eat. It was like his little brain said, "Hey, that tastes pretty good. Who knew I was so hungry?"

Still, we have this psychological battle going. Ann tried feeding him, but he'd only eat if I weren't in the room or if I left his food out while I went to work and he could eat alone and in peace. But mostly, he wouldn't eat.

He'll eat when other dogs were at the house though. He'll watch them devour their food, wait for them to finish, and then put his face in his bowl and finally eat what's served. We talked about getting another dog just to help him out, but realized another mouth to feed wasn't the best idea with our busy schedules.

The final solution was to make his food. I balked at this because I didn't want to be "one of those" kind of dog owners who was over the top spoiling my dog more than I might a child. But he needed to eat and I needed to figure out a way to get him to eat.

Through some research and an accidental contact with a woman who teaches classes on cooking for your dog, I found a recipe that seemed simple enough -- ground meat (beef or chicken or lamb or pork or bison), grated fruits and vegetables, flax seed oil, turmeric (yep!) and some liquid acidophilus. I mixed up a batch of what I called Canine Hamburger Helper and what do you know, he ate.

Like a Lab. Voraciously, enthusiastically, and hungrily...like he hadn't eaten ever before in his life. I felt relief. My dog wouldn't starve to death and he had an appetite. No more force feeding, no more coaxing with sprinkled cheese or exotic dog treats.

Of course this morning, I'm sitting here waiting for him to eat and he's not. Ann says I worry about it too much and that makes him nervous. She's most likely right, but I still find it frustrating. I guess that's my life lesson -- learning to let go of the things I can't control. Leave it to Rubin to provide me with another chance to work on my issues.

He does that a lot -- reflects back what I need to learn. I always say you don't get the dog you want you get the dog you need and Rubin is proving that in spades. I need to relax more. I need to learn to let things go and not stress out about them. I need to slow down. I need to be kinder to myself and allow myself breaks. All of my "issues" are reflected back to me through him. The only thing I can do is take a deep breath and learn patience -- not with him, but with myself.

That's a hard lesson and one I've been trying to learn for most of my life. Still I have to give him kudos for trying to teach me. He's a brave little boy to take me on as a student. I sure wish he could see that he'll need more nutritional strength if he's going to meet this challenge.

And in the background as I type, I hear him sigh deeply and with an edge of exasperation as if to say, "Who's the challenge?"