If I were rich...

If I were rich, I wouldn't do those normal things newly rich do.
I wouldn't buy a house so large I couldn't find my shoelaces.
I wouldn't buy a boat or an expensive car or take a trip around the world.
Don't get me wrong.
As much as I'd like to think I would, I wouldn't give most of my money away to a charity either (some, but certainly not as much as I say I would when I didn't have the money in hand).

I would, however, quit my job. If only temporarily, but not because I don't like it or because it's drudgery or because I'm unappreciated and underpaid.

I'd quit my job so I could enroll in classes at the University or even a Community College or even just the Fine Arts Center in my neighborhood.

I'd take classes in glass blowing and carpentry. I'd sign up for philosophy classes and political science. I'd take classes in literature and writing, but also in molecular biology and introductory classes in zoology. I'd take cooking classes and bread making classes and even classes in dress making, though I truly hate to sew.

I'd take music classes -- lessons on the mandolin that now sits on a shelf unplayed for over a year.

If I were rich, I'd just give as much money as it would take to permanently be in class, not having to teach the class or grade the papers, but still be in the presence of people thinking and doing and sharing.

And if the classes weren't good, I'd drop out and find something else to enroll in. Automotive classes even. Or classes in computer science.

Definitely photography classes. And a painting class. I'd try knitting, but I think I would be impatient, that the knitting would get boring despite all the colors and textures I find appealing in the yarn shop.

I'd hire a personal trainer. I'd take a class in me. (Perhaps that's therapy, but nonetheless...) I'd take classes in massage, though I'd only touch bodies I found appealing. No hairy men. Perhaps no men at all.

I'd take classes in rowing and lacrosse and skating with those nifty new skates called Landrollers. I'd certainly take a swimming class...while I'm a strong swimmer, I would want to learn how to make it effortless like those people at the pool who fly past me even when I'm wearing my zoomer fins.

If I were rich, I'd put all the money into my mind and my body. I might buy a few new gadgets, but I actually think I'd pare down my life and just ride my bike to the next class where I could learn about kayaking or skate skiing or astronomy.

I wouldn't take up scuba diving. Too confining and I don't do well on boats.

I wouldn't mind learning some circus routines. And rock climbing.

And I'd love to learn about rocks in general...geology, but not minerology.

I'd definitely take a botany class and practice saying the names of plants using their scientific names.

If I were rich, I'd even start a scholarship fund for people like me who just want to learn. Perhaps a scholarship for teachers who are tired of teaching and who want to spend more time learning what they skim over in classes.

I'd take classes from the Dog Whisperer. I wonder how much he'd charge?

It's selfish, I know, but if I were rich I'd try to soak up as much as I could as fast as I could for no other reason than it makes me feel alive.

I'd eventually go back to teaching, but only part time because teaching really is about learning and when you give your energy to teaching, there's not much left over for yourself or all the classes you wanted to take.

And I'd keep writing, because I have this belief that money will buy me time and with that time I can fill it up however I choose.

It's probably a myth. I probably wouldn't have anymore time nor would I know what to do with it, but I'd like to think I would. I'd like to think I'd be more motivated.

I'd even take a math class...several, though I'd have to hire a tutor to help me understand it all.

But that's the beauty of being rich...at least I think it is...you wouldn't have to figure out what to eliminate. Especially if you didn't buy the gi-normous house or the expensive yacht or the pricey luxury car or take extravagant trips to Italy every month.

You'd just buy knowledge, or access to knowledge, which probably isn't the wisest investment...not really sustainable...but oh what a ride while you had the money!