After a night of not sleeping...

...I've done remarkably well today. I even walked home from school (3 miles) after walking the not so gentle Ben (dog) for 2 miles this morning. No wonder I'm tired and sweaty and ready for bed.

I threw myself into work today, herding cats (my students) through the final phases of their huge projects for next week's BIG EVENT. We listened to the soundtrack of Akeelah and the Bee while we worked and went outside a few times during the day to enjoy the 80 degree weather. We played kickball, which was a sight as half the girls had on flip flops (better known as thongs in my day, but god forbid you call them that today) and sandals, and more shoes went flying than the ball.

Tomorrow I meet with said-friends (previous post) to discuss our difficulties. I'm not looking forward to it. It will be emotionally exhausting at a time when I don't have a lot of emotions to spare.

This is a tough time of the year. It always makes me laugh (and a bit angry) when people complain that teachers have the summer's off. I've always wanted them to just try my job for a week or two and see if they don't feel the need for a vacation.

Teaching is constant energy out. When I taught in public schools, so much energy went out I had so little left that I broke down emotionally. Now, in private school, though energy still goes out, energy still comes in (much more than when I taught in public schools). Still, at this time of the year, I'm counting down the weeks and the days and the hours until I can bid my class farewell and sleep in for a week or two.

Of course, the downside of the of private school teaching is that I must return August 7 as we are on a 10-month contract. Not a lot of time to recover from this year and as I get older, it takes me longer to recover than it did when I was in my twenties.

Ah, I sound as if I'm complaining. I suppose I am, in one sense, though mostly I'm just tired.

And hot.

I don't do well in the heat.

Hence, I shall forever live in the mild Pacific Northwest away from mugginess, away from mosquitoes, away from floods and hurricanes and tornados.

Will I sleep tonight? That's the big question. We're on the second floor of the mansion and it's warm up there...despite the open windows, despite the breeze from the lake, despite sleeping in a t-shirt or last night, in the buff.

I will shut my eyes and see if I can dream of something other than exhaustion in all of its weird permutations.