Worlds Unknown

We met with our designer yesterday morning. She's quite wonderful at what she does. Since both of us have simple tastes and have never moved beyond eclectic "used" furniture, it's fun to see the possibilities.

And what possibilities there are! Colors, textures, shapes, sizes...my god, it's such a different world from our teacher's perspective.

This happens a lot for me...I get so focused in on what I do for a living (teaching, being with kids, grading papers) I forget there is a larger world out there. Every time we meet with the architect or the builder and now our designer, I see glimpses of the this larger world and then realize that there are hundreds of more "other worlds" out there, each with its own set of descriptors and components.

Then I went to our school's auction night. I've never been to an auction. My god, what an experience. I've never felt so out of place in so many ways.

First, I'm not the kind to get dressed up in anything fancy or girly. I knew last night would be evening gowns and heels and the more I thought about it, the more nervous I got that nothing I had in terms of clothing (since most of it is boxed up and in storage during the remodel) was truly appropriate for such an evening.

Let me back up...added to my wardrobe crisis, I didn't really want to go to this thing. I considered it "work", kibbitzing with parents on one of my day's off, which is something I avoid doing (I want clear lines between my professional life and my personal one). So, not feeling like I had anything appropriate to wear on top of not wanting to really go made my anxiety level rise, rise, rise.

A half hour before I was supposed to get ready, I made Ann go shopping with me at the local ritzy mall just down the street from the house we're living in during our remodel. She was a good sport. Actually, she was more than that as she eventually picked out the shirt/jackety thing I ended up buying (for $135...so much for any money for an auction item!). I figured if I was going to the auction out of obligation rather than desire, I might as well purchase an appropriate "costume" so I could take on a whole different personna than my usual casual teacher role.

But nothing prepared me for the experience of an auction/fundraiser! Sure, I felt comfortable in my clothing, but I wasn't showing any skin like many of the folks, staff and faculty included. Nor did I really understand the world of "open bars", bidding rituals, and accessory diamond jewelery. It was phenomenal.

Once the whole thing started, sitted with my co-workers and feeling a tad bit more comfortable, I was once again blown away by the young woman in her sleeveless evening gown running the auction like some pro at a cattle show.

And the bidding started...and the money flowed just like the booze and after like 10 items going for thousands of dollars, I thought, there's no way anybody has any money left...what are they going to do because there were 30 items left to go!

But the money kept flowing and rich people stood up on their chairs to raise their auction numbers and bidding wars broke out over handmade quilts (one went for $1300 and it was a quilt with digital photographs of my students holding our class chickens...yes, chickens...and all I could think was, hey, wait a minute, I took those photographs!!) and weekends in the San Juans and time-shares in Cabo and fighter jet flying experiences and chocolate mousse in martini glasses ($700!).

Needless to say, my auction number never made it out of my packet. My colleagues played with theirs, throwing them in the air at $100 and then laughing as the bids went higher and higher. Jesus.

There was even a raffle (I bought one ticket for $5, which turned out to be $5.50 with the surcharge!) and whoever won the raffle got half the raffle pot, which turned out to be $900. The woman who won was sitting at the VIP table, which I realized meant she was rich, and she turned around and donated her winnings back to the school. If I had won the thought of donating it back to the school never would have crossed my mind. I would have whooped it up, danced a little jig, and run up to the podium to get my cash, baby!

What a fool I would have been, eh?

Ann and I live comfortably. Sure, we're saving our money, pinching pennies as we try to remodel our house without breaking the bank, but only when I'm in the world of the rich, do I see how different our lives are from those who can toss out $1000 here and there with no thought at all...well, except for the tax deduction they can claim.

One of our faculty members comes from a lot of family wealth. I spoke of my amazement at how much the money was flowing and she said that it's just a fun way for people to donate. It never crossed my mind that "donating" was about fun or that it might even be boring so you have to create entertaining ways to experience it. All the donations I've given were well-thought-out commitments to charities (like Heifer International) who I believed to be doing good work (Red Cross for earthquake and tsunami relief).

Yes, our school does good work...very good work, but I never thought those who donated money needed an "event" to make their giving feel more pleasureable.

A whole different world, I tell you, a whole different world.

Which brings me back to our designer...I'm so glad she makes us feel worthy of her time. I know she works with some big-time clients (Microsoft executives and Amazon big-wigs), but she's been all about budget and creative cost-cutting when she's with us and never at the expense of "cheap" or "ugly" choices.

Not until my auction experience did I realize what a dance she must have to perform with her clients. I asked her once if there were any difference between working with people like us (teachers on a limited budget) and the wealthy. She said that there were no differences really except that the wealthy wanted to overspend far more than the middle class and that folks like us had a better sense of working within a budget.

After last night's auction, I can see what she means. Holy Jesus.

At least I got a nice new shirt/jacket out of the experience!